Youtor
I am failing you
YOUR LINK HERE:
http://youtube.com/watch?v=5yRMtkUWpKo
Learn more about Patrick Teahan, • Childhood Trauma Resources and Offerings • ➡️ https://linktr.ee/patrickteahan • You have no common sense. • • Many of us have heard this phrase, which has stayed with us as a deep shame for most of our lives. We heard it as children and teens from an abusive parent in any of the following everyday childhood situations. • • *Asking if dentists need to go to college. • *Not knowing cars run on gas, or, as a driving teen, how to put air in tires. • *Putting too much milk in the cereal bowl. • *Asking innocent questions. • *Trying to do something nice for a parent • but not knowing Windex is only for glass. • • As we develop from infants to young adults, we need a lot of help, which is the work of basic parenting, which is the day-to-day connection and teaching. • • It's impossible to know everything as a child and teen. Learning, becoming more worldly, and becoming confident is a beautiful process that healthy parents enjoy greatly. • The joy and love of being a parent is watching your grade-schoolers confidently learn how to make a meal for themselves because you've guided them through that process. • And yes, parenting is also draining and frustrating and tests one's patience daily. • • However, toxic parents love to create narratives with such phrases implying that their children are dumb while not giving a safe process of learning. • The narrative about being dumb sticks and is often supported by other family members. It is a total setup. • • In reframing that phrase, let's explore the parent who used it. Might their parenting (if we can call it that) exhibit any of the following? • • *A dangerous lack of understanding of developmental stages and ability levels. • *Incompetence in teaching and preparing children for basics such as navigating the world and understanding how things work. • *An incompetence in communicating what their children need to know to succeed. • *A marked level of entitlement in feeling burdened by parenting rather than understanding the responsibility • *A hypocritical dissonance of having high expectations while severely neglecting their children. • All that is to leave the child feeling ashamed and dumb. • • The reframe is, who had no common sense? • • Leave a comment if you've heard this. • #childhoodtrauma #toxicparent #shame • ⚠️ Disclaimer • My videos are for educational purposes only. Information provided on this channel is not intended to be a substitute for in person professional medical advice. It is not intended to replace the services of a therapist, physician, or other qualified professional, nor does it constitute a therapist-client or physician or quasi-physician relationship. • If you are, or someone you know, is in immediate danger, please call a local emergency telephone number or go immediately to the nearest emergency room. • If you are having emotional distress, please utilize 911 or the National Suicide Hotline • 1-800-273-8255
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